A day before taking the train to London I was still engaged and excited by the idea of finishing some paperwork. Unfortunately yet another massive argument finished the lovely at times but also painful chapter in my life. I decided to go anyway, deep down hoping that maybe it's not the end, as we always ended coming back together. We didn't make it to the final interview and the whole dream burst into pieces. Going back to Paris might have been depressing, but without a doubt there is some fantastic things to photograph. You simply cannot argue with an undeniable beauty of this city. I'm still feeling lonely but now at least there seem to be a valid reason for me to be here. I will have so much to share, it's insane. I remember freaking out facing the perspective of leaving Europe and having very limited time left to visit and explore all my favorite corners in Paris. Not mentioning the other magical places I was planning to travel to. I still had a lot to do and I wanted my time here to be more than just ticking off the boxes of memories to be made. I wanted to soak the atmosphere, go for long walks, sip coffee and enjoy being a parisienne. Now I could do all these things without being rushed by circumstances. As much as I was bitterly mourning my love I was seeing a positive side of the story.
I want to always be prepared for an inspiration to take over. I don't want to miss a chance for a picture, so I make sure I always have at least my phone with me to catch a glimpse of reality. I used to experience a lot but for some reason I was afraid of catching the elusive moments. It was a choice between the experience and the photograph. Then, there was time when I was compulsively taking pictures of everything in panic that the moment will pass. Now I try to reach the balance and I let some things go although I am prepared so I never feel like I'm wasting my time. Every picture is a gift.
I always feel less lonely when I create, even when it's just little scribbles or doodles. Even just writing something while on the train can be inspiring. The only thing that can make creating even better is sharing your thoughts and art with others. Blogging, vlogging, social media allows me to do exactly that and reach more people than ever. It is fulfilling on it's own but I stay hungry for more as I believe we all need others to reflect on us who we are and feel that we are the part of one and the same thing. Sharing my creativity has now become a part of my everyday life and it has only just began.
Until next time,